Week 5

Hello everyone! Today, at Morgan Kelly's suggestion, since the high school youth group found it funny that I had been proposed to several times, I will tell you some of the other random things that have happened to me during this first half of my stay in Ghana.

THE PROPOSALS: Yep, I've been proposed to so many times now that I've lost count. I'd like to say it's because of my striking beauty and mesmerizing charm, but it's really just because I'm white and it's the Ghanaian dream to marry a white girl, I guess. Earlier this week I told the other volunteer that if there were a Hobby Lobby here, I'd go buy some iron-on letters and make a t-shirt that says, "No, I don't want to marry you." He said he saw a kid on the street in Kumasi selling homemade t-shirts that said, "Obruni, marry me and take me to your country," so from what I gather it's just kind of a big joke here.

THE WISDOM OF MR. PETER: We share the volunteer house with Peter (the orphanage manager), his wife, and their four children. Mr. Peter is pretty much our source of entertainment. He is convinced that Eskimos, like UFO's, are just a myth. His two main points when arguing this are a) no Eskimos have ever visited Ghana, and b) no Eskimos have ever competed in the Olympics. We tried to explain that they don't have their own country, so American Eskimos would compete for the USA. He wants proof. He also gives great marriage advice. If a woman has hair and can cook, she will be a good wife. If she can't cook, she can only be a girlfriend. And you want a woman who is fairly big, because that shows she's a good cook if she eats a lot, but not too big. The other volunteer asked if a big woman was too much for him, and he said, "Yes . . . too much food, too much clothes, too much shocks for your car . . . "

MEETING A STAR: One night I was introduced to a guy that Mr. Peter was showing around the orphanage. He introduced him as the goalie of the Ghanaian soccer team. They beat us in the World Cup a few months ago. I joked with him about that and then continued on, playing with the children. It was only later that I realized this guy, in a soccer-crazed country, was probably the equivalent of Michael Jordan or Tiger Woods, and I should have been star-struck! Whoops!

THE WILDLIFE: There are goats everywhere. I asked Mr. Peter one night if they're for milking and he just laughed like that was the funniest thing he'd ever heard. So I asked if they were wild, since they are seriously all over the place, and he laughed even harder. He said they are for meat. Eeew. One day as I was walking on the dirt road to the orphanage, I heard loud rustling in the tall grass beside me and thought, man, that sounds like one big goat . . . and out stepped a giant white humpbacked bull! I about screamed! But it just kept chewing so I kept walking. Two days later I heard children screaming and looked up and there was the bull, chasing them. Did I somehow get on the wrong plane and end up at the running of the bulls in Spain?

SUGAR: The kids' prayers were answered last week when a donation came in that provided money for rice, flour, and, above and beyond what they'd prayed for, sugar! In celebration, it was declared "Ball Float Saturday." I immediately pictured ice cream, but they explained that no, you make dough into balls and drop them into grease and they float. Doughnuts. But they're called Ball Floats here -- which really is the more logical name, don't you think? So anyway, instead of bowls of mush for lunch, everyone had Ball Floats. Check out the picture of three girls hamming it up with theirs.

FUNNY SHOPS: One of the ways people show their Christian faith here is to name their business something that refers to Jesus or the Bible. English is the official language, but for most people it's their second language after their tribal language, so sometimes they inadvertently come up with names that an American like me gets quite a kick out of. Some of my favorites: The Lord is My Shepherd Saw Sharpening Service (try saying that one ten times fast), Only Jesus Can Do Mobile Phone Repair (you can leave your phone with us, but unless there's a miracle . . . ), Doctor Jesus Fuel Injection (I know he gave sight to the blind and raised the dead, but he does fuel injection, too? Amazing!), and Innocent Blood Barber Shop (do you really want to get in that guy's chair?).

So as you can see, it's easy to find a little humor in every day!